In site for almost 3 months now. Conventional wisdom says that these are the toughest 3 months for a Peace Corps Volunteer. The reasons, I would imagine, are because this is the first time you’re actually alone in country. During training, you see your colleagues every day so that certainly helps the effects of when you first arrive in country. Also, once you’re in site, at least in my case, the days are definitely a little slower. Your days are very scheduled during training, 8 to 5 daily, with a ton of work to do each day. Once in site though, you make your own schedule. You arrive in site, and it doesn’t really sink in that you’ll be here for 2 years. Everything absolutely slows down. Every volunteer experience is different, so I only speak for myself when I speak of my experience. Every volunteer manages their time differently. The first couple of days I was afraid to leave my house. I didn’t know anyone in my community, and I also wanted to get to know my family as well as I possibly could. Now though, I feel comfortable enough to wander around my site, (not all areas), and feel fine about it. I’ve made some great connections with people from the school and also with people around my community. The fact that I’m following up a volunteer though, certainly helps. As I’ve said before, I don’t have to continually explain the reasons why a Mexican American has decided to spend the next two years in a community like Guarari. People in my community know, and seem to trust the Peace Corps thanks to Matt (my predecessor), and are comfortable with the idea of having another volunteer. Having Matt has definitely helped my integration into my community, although the people of my community will certainly ask me, “¿Y Mateo?” on a daily basis, but I’ve grown to accept that. I also hope that they’ll grow to accept me, and I think that shouldn’t be too big of an obstacle. I’m certain that for a while they’ll compare me to Matt, I’ll just have to relay the fact that I’m a different person and will do certain things differently. But, I digress.
The reason for this post was to vent, somewhat. So back to the first 3 months of site...I can understand now why Peace Corps has led us to believe that these are the most trying times of our service. One really doesn’t know how to occupy themselves with so much free time. I essentially went to the school on a daily basis, but I certainly didn’t spend the entire day there, so I had to do something to occupy my time. People back home usually ask me what I do on a daily basis, but every day is different, so I’ll paraphrase. I’ll wake up usually around 7:30, have Gallo Pinto and coffee (that’s basically the same every single day). Then I’ll go to the school and ask if the Interdisciplinary Team needs any help or I’ll go pitch some project ideas...which I will delve into in a second. So, I’ll talk to them for a while, go home and eat lunch. My host mom usually has a great selection of lunch items being that she runs her own little restaurant. Then, I’ll go to Heredia and go to an Internet Cafe and kill some hours there. I return home, and that’s when it gets slow. I’ll have my afternoon coffee, or milk and some cookies with my host mom as she’s closing the restaurant and helping my host sister, Larissa, with her homework. I’ll tell them about my day, maybe share an anecdote of living in the States, because they love that. I really can’t say enough about how incredible my host family has been. They are incredibly supportive and I get along with all of them very well. The past couple of weeks have been a struggle for me because I felt, for the first time, actually homesick. I didn’t feel like packing my belongings and going home, but I was feeling despondent, and my host parents could tell. They constantly asked me if I was doing okay, and I told them I was, but their concern certainly makes me feel like they like having me here. In a previous conversation with my host mom, I had mentioned the fact that I really enjoy pancakes and bacon for breakfast...so during my tough week, one morning I woke up and went to eat breakfast and to my surprise my host mom was making me pancakes with bacon (even if they think it’s a ridiculous breakfast combination). To say the least, that certainly lifted my spirits and eased the homesickness considerably. With this experience that I’m having, who would have thought that pancakes could go such a long way? Sure, we had pancakes that same day for lunch and dinner...but I still greatly appreciated it. As for the reason of the homesickness, which still lingers a little bit, is because I felt that I haven’t been doing enough in my site since I arrived. Fellow volunteers have helped me put everything in perspective though and I realize that it is still very early in my service and even though I have no concrete projects completed, I have made great strides in my community and feel that project ideas will surely start to develop soon. Another reason I was down was because we were planning a Talent Show, that I mentioned in my previous post along with the student government, but that completely fell through. The government showed interest when we presented the idea, but when it came down to it, they wanted the adults to do all the work for them, and that’s not what it’s about. We have to make sure that they participate as well, so when they fell out, we had to cancel it. Now though, the teacher and I have decided to go a different route and have a talent show next month, hopefully with the support of the government.
I feel that I have plenty of ideas, but until I actually accomplish them, that’s all they will be. Is ideas. My main project idea for now is to start a Guarari monthly newsletter, written by the kids of the school. I think this project could work and be sustainable if I make sure to do it correctly and have someone from the community help me. Another big project idea that I have is a mentoring program that would place one university student with an at-risk child in the school. These kids lack, more than anything, someone they look up to. I’m hoping that the university student can dedicate one day out of the week to spend with the kid and convey the idea that staying in school should be a top priority. The drop-out rate in Guarari is absurd, and sometimes I wonder what I can really do to help a community where it seems that sometimes the parents don’t even worry if their kids stay in school and get ahead. Another project idea is to build a skate/bmx area where the youth in the community can practice their extreme sporting! I see kids everyday on skateboards and bikes but they can only ride on the streets and with the streets here, that’s probably not the safest thing to do. So I do have project ideas, I just have to give it some time, it just needs a little time.
Alright, enough venting. During my spare time, I have been reading a lot. I have read 7 books in 2 months of service, which is a lot for me, believe it. I highly recommend the Autobiography of Malcolm X, which immediately became my favorite book. He brought to light the fact that I truly know nothing about myself, my heritage and culture and it certainly got me thinking. I also recommend “The Road” by Cormac McCarthy, although it may be a little dark. If you have any book ideas, please let me know...or even better, you can send it to me. Sending a care package never hurt, right? Try not to forget about me, friends! I really miss you all very much and, si Dios quiere, I’ll see most of you very soon. I officially asked for my vacation days and I will be in Texas, if all goes according to plan, from December 17th to January 5th. First to Austin, then to El Paso! Ohhh, it feels so good to say that.
Warm regards,
Mario C.
